Tag Archives: dogs

Prince of Pop

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On June 25th, 2009 I was in Istanbul, Turkey getting ready to leave for Santorini, Greece. And on June 25th, 2009 Michael Jackson died. It was sad to a lot of people, I’m sure. I guess you could say I was a little more than sad. I had tickets to see Michael in London at the O2 that July. I had been waiting to see Michael Jackson in concert since I was 3 years old dancing around the family room, watching his videos on VHS, learning his dances and singing his songs. It was almost like someone in my family had died. I got so many “sorry for your loss” emails from friends and family asking me if I was OK. (I got the same type of sympathy emails when Jimmy Fallon got engaged, but that’s another story entirely.)

So I flew to Greece where I would be on my own for one day before meeting back up with my friend who I had been traveling with. My iPod broke on my trip over and it just so happened that the only 2 songs I had on my iPhone were “Human Nature” and “Butterflies” by Michael Jackson. I listened to those songs on repeat and wallowed in my sadness until I checked into my hostel in Santorini.

I went out to get dinner and when I came back there was an adorable white lab at my doorstep. He was blocking the door and looked like he just needed a friend. How could I say no to a precious puppy all alone on an island? I brought him in and we snuggled all night long listening to “Human Nature” and “Butterflies”. I named him Prince in honor of Michael Jackson. Prince followed me around the whole week I was in Greece.

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Yes, he was a stray dog.
Yes, he gave me fleas.
Yes, it was worth it.

The Pessimist’s Guide to Runyon Canyon.

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If you want to go on a hike in LA, one of the most popular places to go is Runyon Canyon.

Let’s start from the beginning of the “LA version” of a good hike: finding parking.

It doesn’t matter what time of day you go, you will drive around for 45 minutes looking for parking. I don’t know how many times (three) I’ve attempted to go for a hike, got pissed that I couldn’t find parking and ended up going to the In-N-Out Burger that is conveniently located just down the street instead in my workout clothes.

Once (if) you find parking and you begin your hike, there are some things to note:

1) It smells like dog shit when you first walk in. You will get used to it.

2) The entire time you’ll see idiots running up and down the stairs. Just ignore them.

3) You will think you’ve made it to the top and you will take a deep breath. And then you will realize there is one final stretch of stairs. (This is the point where my roommate once cried.) You will most likely tell the person you are with who made you come with them to go to Hell (sorry about that, Chad).

4) When you get to the top you’ll realize the entire hike only took 15 minutes and you will be annoyed that it really wasn’t that hard of a workout.

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It is however pretty great for people watching. I’ve seen a man sprint up the stairs wearing flip flops. I’ve seen a guy carrying a 95 pound snake named Zeus (find him on instagram @snakegod). I’ve seen a dude in a floor length fur coat carrying a boom box and singing at the top of his lungs while walking 6 dogs. And I’ve seen Gerard Butler. You’ll also see men wearing button up collared shirts on their phones and then you’ll see people like me who also look like they don’t belong.

I know this is the pessimist’s guide and I just listed off a bunch of shitty things about it but there are some good things to note as well:

1) There’s food and water available to you before you head in that runs on the honor system.. (put a dollar in the box if you take something)

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2) There is free yoga at the bottom of the hike. 

3) On a clear day it really does have great views of the city.

4) There are tons of dogs. Everywhere.

5) If you go when it isn’t busy and you take a book you can sit and read for hours.

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Ryan Gosling Doesn’t Drink.

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One day I saw this guy walking his dog on my street as I was pulling into my driveway. He said hello as I got out of my car and we started chatting. For the first few minutes of our conversation I was convinced this guy was Ryan Gosling. We were sort of far away from each other and it was really bright out so I couldn’t see perfectly. Towards the end of the conversation I introduced myself. I was expecting him to say Ryan, so when he introduced himself as [insert name here that isn’t Ryan] I of course, forgot it immediately.

I was hoping I would run into him again, because Ryan Gosling or not, he was really cute. (I googled if Ryan Gosling had a brother or a twin..turns out – he does not.)

Cut to a few months later on a Sunday morning in early September. My roommates and I were all severely hungover from a night out of drinking and dancing at Cherry Pop (best gay club for dancing in LA)..It was obvious that we needed Taco Bell to help nurse our hangovers. I volunteered to go. As I was walking down the driveway (makeup still on from the night before, tank top, boxers, nike dunks..I have definitely looked better) the sun was so bright and I was so disoriented that I missed a step but caught my fall on the railing. As soon as I looked up I saw Ryan Gosling walking toward me with his dog. Our conversation went something like this..

RG: “Hey!”

Me “Hey! How are you?”

RG “Good, I’m so tired though..I did not want to get out of bed today.”

Me “Oh I know how you feel. You’re hungover?

RG “Actually I was just up late working, I don’t drink.”

– – Awkward pause – –

Between the unforeseen turn that the conversation took and the fact that I was going to faint if I didn’t get Taco Bell into my system ASAP – I had to get out of there. I don’t remember exactly what happened next but I think I said something like “Welp, gotta go!” and ran for my car.

As I was going through the drive thru I realized that we don’t have much in common.. and that he doesn’t look that much like Ryan Gosling. Such a shame.

Of course after that day, I ran into him about twelve times that next week.

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